A NEW new beginning.

So, in my last post, I talked about how I was striving to serve our Lord more.  I have been doing this and it's been really great. I go to church every Sunday morning, if at all possible, I attend STUMO on Thursday nights through UCO, and I've been going to church with my best friend, Cherish, on Wednesday nights to the Church of Christ, which isn't my denomination but I love it!  I've recently broken up with my boyfriend, so I've been struggling a lot for the past few weeks.  We dated for a little over fourteen months, so I was used to having him around all of the time.  And now, he's just.. Gone.  The person I loved more than anything, the guy I thought that I was going to marry, just stepped out of my life out of no where.  You can only imagine how devastating it was for me.  I didn't have any answers as to why he would just break up with me. I thought everything was okay.  I didn't know what to do with myself.  I couldn't eat.  I couldn't sleep.  I could barely function.  I thought I had lost my entire world and nothing I did would ever bring it back.  It was a rough time, for sure.. But I've recently realized how foolish I've been.  This whole ordeal that I've been going through is all for a purpose.  God is calling out to me.  He's giving me the perfect opportunity to make my way right with Him.  No distractions, no temptations.  Just Him.  It's my time to shine God's light on the world, so that is exactly what I am going to do. :) It's time to live it up, keep my head high, and be happy.

What I want.

2011, a new beginning. Well, my new beginning actually started in 2010 when I realized just how far I had fallen in my relationship with God.  I wasn't going to church anymore - I didn't even try to wake up early enough to go. In high school, before my life turned completely around, I wouldn't miss a Sunday or Wednesday at church if my life depended on it.  I'm not really sure who to blame for the sudden change but myself. I started hanging out with the wrong people, and before I knew it, missing church wasn't even a worry anymore for me.  I eventually quit hanging out with those people because I knew what kind of person I was turning into. But for some reason, I still didn't even try to wake up for church anymore.  Yeah, I'd think about it every once in a while, but when the alarm clock went off on Sunday morning, I would think hey.. I only get two days to sleep in, and today is one of them, which obviously is a terrible excuse! I always told myself that when I got back to college I would find a good church and start going to it regularly. Well folks, here I am, my second year, second semester in college and I have yet to do that.  But.. I also just got up here, and I assure you. The next available opportunity for church, I am taking it.  Over Christmas break, I made myself get up and go to the church my family goes to, and I was very proud of myself for doing so.  I want a change.  I want to be that same girl that I was back in high school, when I would literally cry if I had to miss church.  I want to praise the Lord until I cry for mercy because He is so amazing. I want to not be afraid to raise my hands during worship like I used to. I want to constantly feel that love that I did everyday because I knew that my number one priority was to please our Heavenly Father.  That's what I want. And that is what I will accomplish.

CHERISH RANAE SHEFFIELD

is my BEST FRIEND. :) And she keeps on buggin' me to write a blog. I tell her I will, but then I don't. So, now I'm going to. ABOUT HER! :) She's wonderful. Every time I see her, I end up peeing my pants because she's just so darn funny! Next semester, we will have EVERY SINGLE CLASS TOGETHER, which I am way freaking excited about in case you were wondering. We are both Elementary Education majors, and it would be totally cool if we taught at the same school so our classes could have wars. :) This girl is  not only the funniest girl I know, but the Godliest. She may not know it, but it's because of her that I am striving to make my relationship stronger with God. I mean, I never stopped being a Christian, I just slipped a lot when I got to college. God shines through her so much, and I want people to see the same through me. To Cherish Ranae Sheffield, I thank you for being not only my friend, but my rolemodel. I love you dearly. :)

It's not the best.

Have you ever had that feeling in the pit of your stomach where you feel like something is going to go wrong, but you have no idea what? And all you can do is anticipate for that something to happen? I've had that feeling for the last few days. I don't know what it is.. Something just doesn't feel right. And I can't figure it out. I hate it! It's putting me in a down mood, which isn't good.  I just can't make myself feel happy because I feel like I'm missing something.  I can't just fix it either, by just telling myself I'm happy, because I'm not.  I ended up crying myself to sleep last night, and I don't know why.  Yesterday was supposed to be a good day. It was my one year anniversary with my boyfriend.  Maybe it was because it just felt like another day. I mean all we did was go eat lunch at Flatire, I mean we eat lunch together everyday.  And then we went to Best Buy, for the 5th time, for my laptop.  Then, we went to workout.  We didn't have any alone time, which actually kind of upsets me.  But I mean, I'd be over it by now if that were the problem.  I wish I knew what was wrong with me. I just can't seem to figure it out.
On a side note, I was on Uconnect today and I was looking through the members that are going to be in my classes next semester. Not only do I have Cherish and Brittney in like every single one of my classes, but I have a few other people that I know in them as well.  One person, in particular, I am not too fond of.  Unfortunately, I need that class, so I will deal with it.
On another side note, pretty soon I will be driving back home.  And I cannot wait.  Thanksgiving is just a few days away! Yay.  I miss home and my family and my cat.. lol And I also like the idea that I don't have class for the rest of the week. I actually love that. But I do have two tests next Monday, which means I will be studying over the break.. Yayy.. Anywho, I think I'm gonna wrap this up. Maybe next time I will have an explanation to my condition.. lol
Ta ta for now! <3

The season of thankfulness.

Thanksgiving has got to be at least my second favorite Holiday.  Christmas, of course, comes in first place.  I love Thanksgiving time, not only because we get out of school for a few extra days, but because I get to spend a day with my family, eating mouth-watering turkey, dinner roles, cranberry jell-O, and green bean casserole! Yum! Every year at Thanksgiving dinner, my family goes around the table telling everyone what they are thankful for.  I am thankful for so many things in my life, it's hard to chose only one! So, I will inform you of the most important in my opinion.

Number one is my mom and grandparents.  Without them, I wouldn't have life, good morals, support, and most importantly, love.  Everyone tells me that I have my mothers genes.  From my boyfriend telling me that I get my weirdness from her, to various people telling me that I look like her, I guess you could say that I fit in her genes quite well!  My grandparents are huge contributors to my life.  I learn most of my important life lessons through them.  My grandpa is always teaching me something new, and my grandma - well let's just say sometimes I feel like I'm teaching her a few things, like how to get to the HSN website. All in all, I absolutely adore my family, and wouldn't change a thing about them.

Number two is my boyfriend, Jake Erron Hall. We have been together for almost a year, and I'd have to say that it has been the best year of my life.  He means the world to me.  He makes me feel comfortable with myself, he makes me laugh, he makes me smile.. He just brightens my day, and I love him for that. Jake's family is also amazing.  I feel like a part of the family every time I am with all of them.  I love his parents because I can talk to them, and I don't feel awkward. And I love his little brother, because he is already practically my own little brother! I just love them all. 

Number three is UCO.  This is the only college that I actually applied for, and I didn't really know why. But I feel like this is where I am supposed to be. It's a beautiful campus, everyone is friendly (mostly), and it's small and convenient.  I've lived on campus since last year, and I love it.  I can just roll out of bed and walk to class, or ride my bike if I choose. my major is Elementary Education, and this school has a great education program, which is awesome! I am so ready to get through all of my classes and begin my career!
I have so much more that I am thankful for, but I don't want to get too detailed here, so I think top three is good enough. :)
So what are you thankful for?

Geek Squad? Pshh. More like lazy, money suckers!

So I went to pick up my laptop today at Best Buy, thinking it was going to work right again.  Well, it is exactly how it was when I took it there. Minus a few viruses apparently? I am just so frustrated! Ughh.. I get to enroll in the morning, and now I may not get to because of my stupid computer.  Speaking of enrolling.  I have figured out my schedule for next semester! And, boy is it going to hurt.  Six classes, and two of them are in the evening. Phew! Good thing my friend Cherish is going to be in every single class with me! It's also a good thing that we are in the same major! :) Yayy! I am pretty excited about this.  Anyways. I am starving, and I haven't eaten since about eleven this morning! :/ So, I'm going to say goodnight, and go eat! Ta ta for now! <3

In the beginning.

So, I'm not really sure what exactly to write on here.  I've always heard of blogging being something like open, online journaling. So I guess that's exactly what I will do.  Not exactly sure what to write at the moment, but I guess I will figure something out later.  For now, I need to go get some laundry done. I just woke up from a two hour nap, so I need to do something productive.  I get my laptop back tomorrow! :) Yay! Ta ta for now! <3