What I want.

2011, a new beginning. Well, my new beginning actually started in 2010 when I realized just how far I had fallen in my relationship with God.  I wasn't going to church anymore - I didn't even try to wake up early enough to go. In high school, before my life turned completely around, I wouldn't miss a Sunday or Wednesday at church if my life depended on it.  I'm not really sure who to blame for the sudden change but myself. I started hanging out with the wrong people, and before I knew it, missing church wasn't even a worry anymore for me.  I eventually quit hanging out with those people because I knew what kind of person I was turning into. But for some reason, I still didn't even try to wake up for church anymore.  Yeah, I'd think about it every once in a while, but when the alarm clock went off on Sunday morning, I would think hey.. I only get two days to sleep in, and today is one of them, which obviously is a terrible excuse! I always told myself that when I got back to college I would find a good church and start going to it regularly. Well folks, here I am, my second year, second semester in college and I have yet to do that.  But.. I also just got up here, and I assure you. The next available opportunity for church, I am taking it.  Over Christmas break, I made myself get up and go to the church my family goes to, and I was very proud of myself for doing so.  I want a change.  I want to be that same girl that I was back in high school, when I would literally cry if I had to miss church.  I want to praise the Lord until I cry for mercy because He is so amazing. I want to not be afraid to raise my hands during worship like I used to. I want to constantly feel that love that I did everyday because I knew that my number one priority was to please our Heavenly Father.  That's what I want. And that is what I will accomplish.